morale has been plunging since we returned from taiwan. i dont think my oc is the only one at fault. across the battalion everyone is feeling jaded. worn out. and just not quite ready for the 1 last mission that would mark the end of chionging suas. i dont even want to imagine how disastrous it'd be if jan comes and we head into atec in this state. all the good work or rather hard work. since we're not actually that excellent as they describe us to be. would be gone. holy shittt. but seriously. even i dont feel like giving a damn about this last atec.

and i dont get why everyone is in a hurry to grow up. we'll get there when we get there. we're just gonna end up regretting it when we look back. after the novelty of being a grown up wears off and the effects of additional shit slaps us in the face.

*piak*

something like that.

i truly admire those that have the courage and determination to defy all odds to work for their dreams. its throwing everything away for that slim chance. and i hate that i do not have that.

this getting sad and depressing. not so christmas-ee.